I'm discovering something. I think I'm finally finding a way to freedom, but it is a road that I hate the mere thought of traveling. It is the road of community, the road of opening up my life to people around me and just being honest about who I am, where I hurt, and how much I need help. You see, in my family, we never showed any weakness or let down our guard. You kept the hurt bottled up at all costs. Do not ever pour your heart out to anyone else. Those feelings are for you to deal with alone.

But, surprise of all surprises, that's not working. I can't live like this anymore; trying to walk through adversity and pain all alone. I need community. Even though it is unnatural and painful, I need someone who can look in my eyes, know the hurt that's there, and walk with me through it. I need to know that people can accept me, brokenness and all. And you know what....as I open up, I'm finding that people really do care, and will listen to me as I share the dark, embarrassing parts of me. It makes the battle with the demons of my past much easier when I know that there are true brothers who are honestly watching out for me. Does that make sharing any more unnatural and uncomfortable? No. But, it does make the pain bearable and the journey joyful.

"There can be no vulnerability without risk; there can be no community without vulnerability; there can be no peace, and ultimately no life, without community." -M. Scott Peck

"What should young people do with their lives today? Many things, obviously. But the most daring thing is to create stable communities in which the terrible disease of loneliness can be cured." -Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.